To My Ex’s Future Girlfriend,
I respect you.
I know that sounds funny to hear. I don’t know you yet and neither does he. If you were wondering, we’re hot on the heels of a breakup– it’s never pretty, is it? But, above all else, I trust that my ex’s decision was sound before he went and let his heart get involved. He doesn’t just give his heart away like a handout, you know. You’re lucky to see a side of him that goes unnoticed and unknown. I promise you will spend a better half of your time getting lost in the thick of the woods before you come out on the other side, but I also promise his moon is the brightest shine you’ll ever see.
You may be wondering about me– the ex, the other girl, the girl before you. I promise I’m not as scary or bitchy or cold as I may seem. While it’s true, he did use to lay his head in my arms and cry when he saw me crying, we were two people with one foot in two completely different worlds. Hard as we tried to make it work, our lives never really bisected where they needed to. It was no fault of his and no fault of mine.
That doesn’t change the fact that he’s yours now, and your hands will be the hands to cradle his when I no longer can. I love him selflessly enough to want the best for him. If he believes you’re it, I do too. I promise there’s no ego, no selfishness, no ulterior motives or strings attached. I really mean it. I have always wanted the best for him, and now I want the best for you.
But there are still some things I want you to know…
- He’s horrible at picking up his phone.
It’s not because he’s ignoring you. In fact, he’s probably thinking about you that very moment. He probably just can’t find the words or time to send a simple text back, or return the call. In fact, it may seem like he’s ignoring you excessively, but that’s just translation for,”Hey, a lot is happening in my life right now. I care about you a lot and I’m thinking about you, but I just can’t call right now.” It’ll be fine. Don’t make it the end of the world. Some guys are great at texting and some are not.
2. His life is all sorts of crazy.
I know it may seem like you didn’t sign up for this, or whatever chaos being his girlfriend entails, but if you truly care about him the way I hope you will, you’ll stick around to see more of it. I can’t promise it will be easy, but I can promise it will be worth it.
3. He will look at you like you are the sun. Every. Single. Time.
If you ever wanted a boy to look at you like you are the sun changing faces into the moon, both glorious and as equally beautiful, look no further. He will make you feel like a living, walking, breathing gem on this Earth. You’ll finally know what writers mean when they write about love at first sight. It exists, and you’ll be able to see how real it is from the first time he lays eyes on you.
4. He will probably make you question everything you know and feel. Prepare well.
He is the kind of person who debates the meaning of life on a regular basis, and who likes to include you in talks of his future and where he’s headed. This is normal. Prepare your heart and your head for this, because as soon as he opens his mouth, all you’re going to see is a future with him. I hope to God for both of your sakes, that hope isn’t ripped away.
5. He is selfish.
That isn’t to say he’s selfish in the way that is destructive or malicious, but rather, he often forgets about others but himself. He may be your number one priority, but there’s no telling what you’ll be in his world. Though it’s easy to fall head over heels for him (trust me, I know), it takes time for him to warm to the thought of having you around, unconditionally, all-access, all the time. He’s used to people leaving. A part of him foresees you leaving too. He constructs a wall well. It’s up to you to break it down.
6. I want you to be happy together.
Because when it comes down to it, I will always love him, and a piece of him will always be with me. Over time, I’d like to see that broken piece mend to a whole. I hope you two find the happiness that we didn’t have the chance to. I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: I want the best for him, sure, but I hope he finds the best with you.